duminică, 29 mai 2011

Bubulina`s Lullaby

           I am selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times, hard to handle, but if you can`t handle me at my worst, then you absolutely don`t deserve me at my best.
          I`ve tried to stand you when you were upset, uptight and idiot, I`ve really tried. Now, I cannot do this anymore `cause you are just a stupid guy who at our first row was going away poutfully and you were acting like a child, actually, you are a silly child.
           I am selfish `cause I want you for my own, I want you relaxed and childish, ripe and honest and I wish you were here. I am impatient `cause I can`t wait, `cause my heartbeat is more and more powerful, `cause I`m broken and I don`t feel right.
          I`m a little insecure `cause we both are crazy and unpredictable and in the following second I can scream at you and you can tell me `Shut the fuck up!`. I am out of control, I scream, I cry, I laugh, I sleep, I sing, I dance, I love. I make mistakes, I was eager, I said too soon what it shouldn`t and in our relationship is a mess and I know, I`m hard to handle, but if you can`t handle me at my worst, when I`m yelling, when I`m crying and when I`m saying `You are just a stupid boy!` then you absolutely don`t deserve me at my best; when I kiss you on your cheek, when I`m blushing looking warmfully into your hazel eyes, when I`m trying to calm down because you are here.
         I`ve lost you when I`ve loved you the most and the wind was soothing my cheeks `cause wind is when you embrace me and I feel your love, `cause wind is the voice that whispers a lullaby each time I go to sleep at night thinking of you, `cause wind is that invisible person who leaves in my soul an unbearable mark. Wind is you, beloved ghost from the past!
       But… you are still a ghost and you will always be one, `cause you can`t handle me, `cause I am bad and selfish, `cause you don`t even know me…  So, sweet ghost from the past, stay in the past and let me wallow in my  hyprocrisy!

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